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I Owe You an Explanation About What’s Going On
Hi Friends and Supporters, I feel like I’ve sent you the “here’s what’s going on” email a few times, but thank you for your patience. There’s a lot of moving parts and changes being made and I think it’s important that you know what’s going on. There are 3 big changes happening. First, changing…
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Six Important Updates for Supporters: Good News, Better News, and Donor News
It has been a season of significant changes at home, as XtianNinja, and at the TACO Network, so I want to sharing some important news for donors and exciting news about where we are headed. I’ve said it a million times, but it truly can’t be understated how blessed I am to have you…
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Why it Matters That I Just Made Partner on YouTube
In a world where people like MrBeast has hundreds of millions of subscribers and makes millions of dollars, hitting the 2000 subscriber mark might seem like small potatoes, but it’s actually an important digital ministry milestone. I’ve been creating content online for a lot of years now and released hundreds of videos, but it’s…
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The State of Things (XN Update)
A while back, I shared a story with my stream community and want to share it with you, too. It was something of a spiritual “vision” I had one day while praying for direction. (I’m a pretty conservative guy, but I’ve been learning more about listening to God, and He has only done this,…
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A Year of Contrasts (2025 XtianNinja Year-In-Review)
Reflecting on 2025 is complicated because it has been a year of profound contrast. In the same year, I’ve spoken on global stages and sat alone with a heavy, broken heart. My channel started the year with great momentum but ended with the lowest numbers I’ve seen in four years. At the beginning of…
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I Went to the Most Important Creator Event in the World (ReachConf Recap 2025: What Happened and Why It Mattered So Much)
When I first heard about ReachConf, it sounded almost too on-the-nose for what I care about: a conference for Christian gamers, streamers, cosplayers, and content creators, hosted in a church, built around the gospel, and unapologetically nerdy. Thanks to an absurd amount of generosity from my community, I actually got to go and was…
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Public Message About Ending Dragon Roast Partnership
I want to give a quick update for transparency’s sake. You might’ve noticed that I’ve quietly stepped away from my partnership with Dragon Roast Coffee. This wasn’t due to any drama or disagreement. The folks at Dragon Roast have been absolutely fantastic to work with. They’re kind, generous, and passionate about what they do.…
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Reach Lore Talk
Merging who God created you to be with who God called you serve,through the content God wants you to create MotherGoose Opens & Introduces Topic Briefly XN STORY: I remember when I first started as a pastor, straight out of seminary, I had no idea what I was doing. And that’s not an…
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Headed to Florida for ReachConf 2025!
Wow, it’s finally time! We’ve been talking about this for months now and I’m finally packed and ready to get on the plane. Reach is going to be amazing! For those who don’t k ow, ReachConf is meant to celebrate and inspire Christian creators, focused on fun experiences, relational connection, learning, and kingdom impact.…
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Family Update: Thanksgiving & Life 37 Days In
For those who haven’t been following along, Anita entered a residential treatment program a little over a month ago to work through some serious mental health challenges. It’s been 37 days as of today, and she’s really been getting a lot out of the program—especially the individual counselling. I’m going to keep this update…
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Personal Update: Reflections on My Sabbatical & a Brief Delay
I’m writing this personal update with those who’ve been walking with me for a while – leadership team, supporters, donors, volunteers, viewers – but a lot of people have discovered me through this crisis. If you’re new here and wondering who I am and what this is all about, check out my Digital Missions…
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Anita Update: A Hard Call, a Good Turn, and What’s Next?
The last two weeks were hard to settle. It took days for me to stop looking over my shoulder waiting for the next bad thing—scary texts, horrible calls, more bad news. No one likes living with uncertainty, so I’m really glad to report that I just got off a call with Anita and we…
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An Important Update About My Work with TACO and XtianNinja Online Missions
To my donors, friends, prayer partners, subscribers, and the whole of TACO and the XtianNinja FamSquad: Right now Anita is in a highly structured residential setting receiving focused, specialist care. It’s the kind of environment hospital models haven’t been able to provide, and it is giving her a real chance to stabilise with dignity.…
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Why I Quit on Stream Today: What happened today, what’s underneath it, and what I need right now
Short version: I’m carrying more than I can manage, so the glitch felt like a collapse. Computer crashed and then I crashed. What happened on stream Anyone who has streamed for any length of time knows that glitches happen. “It wouldn’t be a Twitch stream if everything went right!”, we say. I’m used to…
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Family Update: Processing the Goodbye
If you’d rather watch than read, I shared this update in two places: a shorter 17-minute edited video on YouTube (link) and a longer 34-minute version on Twitch (link). Both cover the same heart I’ll share here, but if you prefer to listen, those are ready for you. The Story So Far For four…
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Descheneau Family Update: A Miracle of Provision and the Next Step in Anita’s Care
Over the weekend, God provided in ways I can hardly believe. In just three days, we raised over $17,000 of the $27,000 needed for Anita’s treatment. That’s nothing short of miraculous. It means we’re able to secure her place at Valiant and she moves in tomorrow. An unfortunate surprise came when I was told…
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My Family Is Breaking: We Need Urgent Help
You’ve seen my struggles on stream. What you haven’t seen is the hidden battle my wife Anita has been fighting for years. Now her doctors say there’s one chance left for real healing. We need urgent help: https://www.givesendgo.com/GJNMD
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Torture for Views: The Death of Jean Pormanove and What It Teaches Us About Streaming, Exploitation, and Digital Missions
This article is about the on-stream death of French streamer Raphaël Graven. It covers what’s known (as best I could learn of Aug 20, 2025), the warnings that were ignored, and the wider culture that turns suffering into spectacle. Strong content ahead. You can also watch my full breakdown and reflections on YouTube here:…
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TACO Training Returns: A Free 8-Week Course for Christian Content Creators (Aug 9 – Oct 4, 2025)
Are you a Christian streamer, gamer, artist, podcaster, or online creator who wants to share Jesus through your content—but you’re not sure where to start or how to stay faithful while doing it? TACO Training is for you. From August 9 to October 4, 2025, join us for this completely free, 8-week, virtual course…
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Celebrating 4 Years of Digital Ministry: XN’s 4th Streamiversary Subathon!
A Milestone Worth Celebrating – And You’re Invited! Four years of digital ministry – now it’s time to celebrate! On March 16th at 10:00 AM (EST), I’m hosting a Subathon packed with giveaways, challenges, and community-driven rewards. Every gifted sub unlocks new milestones, making this a celebration shaped by you! What’s a Subathon?A special…
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“They Told My Friend to 💀 Themselves”
Ministry isn’t just happening in counselling offices and churches anymore—it’s happening live, online, in real time. During one of my livestreams, a viewer came into chat, shaken and angry. They had just witnessed something heartbreaking—a classmate had told their friend to end their life. They had spent 20 minutes trembling in fear and frustration,…
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Where is God When Things Don’t Get Better?
This week on Wellness Wednesday, we explored a difficult but important reality: What do we do when things don’t get better? So many people in our digital community are struggling—whether with mental health, relationships, unanswered prayers, or just the weight of life—and they’re looking for real answers. My mission with Wellness Wednesday is to…
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Content Strategy and The Twitch in 2025: Reaction to Harris Heller’s Video
What is TACO & Why This Discussion Matters TACO (The Alliance for Creative Outreach) is a network dedicated to helping Christian content creators thrive in digital spaces. Whether it’s through streaming, videos, or community-building, our goal is to equip and support creators who want to make a meaningful impact. Part of that mission is…
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TikTok Ban: A Christian Creator’s Perspective
The growing concerns surrounding TikTok—its extensive data collection, its ties to ByteDance in China, and government actions worldwide—have left many creators uncertain about the platform’s future. These developments present unique challenges for creators who use TikTok to connect with their audiences. More importantly, they raise serious questions about how we, as Christians, handle influence,…
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Overworking and Burnout: What Are the Signs? (Plus Practical Steps and Biblical Wisdom)
Burnout. It’s a word we hear often but don’t fully understand until it hits us. For me, this subject is deeply personal. In 2009, I hit a wall—a wall I didn’t even see coming. I was pastoring at a church that could only be described as abusive. Weekly meetings stretched into the early hours…
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The Mission Field Your Church Is Overlooking: Reaching Digital Communities
Summary In this post, I want to share highlights from a recent conversation I had with the Sunday School at Markham Chinese Alliance Church, hosted by Pastor Nathan Kwan. I was invited to discuss the heart of my ministry: reaching the lost and disenfranchised through digital platforms like Twitch. This post addresses key questions…
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The Art of Being Interesting: 6 Steps to Build Real Connections
Many creators share a common fear: I’m not interesting. This self-doubt can be paralyzing, hindering their ability to connect with their audience and build meaningful online communities. During a recent stream, a simple joke about feeling uninteresting sparked a powerful conversation, revealing how widespread this insecurity is. Many creators expressed similar feelings of inadequacy,…
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“I’m Just Not Okay” – What to Do When You, Someone You Know, or Your Favourite Content Creator Is Not Okay (Wednesday Check-In)
Introduction This week for the Wednesday Check-In, I want to focus on a deeply personal message that someone shared in our Discord’s prayer channel: “I’m just not okay.” Many of us have felt this way. Whether you’re a content creator struggling with burnout, a viewer battling anxiety, or someone feeling lost and disconnected—this message…
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Big News: My Bookshop Is Open With Exclusive Discounts!
I’m excited to announce that my bookshop is officially open! It features a variety of resources, including sermon collections, Bible studies, a devotional, and my newest book, The Art of Digital Influence. Each title is crafted to inspire and equip you on your faith journey. Whether you’re exploring God’s Word, seeking encouragement, or learning to…
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Finding God in Our Grief (Wednesday Check-In)
Every Wednesday, we gather as a community for a special “Wednesday Check-In”—a time where we share, reflect, and grow together taking topics from the TACO Tribe Discord discussions. This past week, we confronted some of the hardest questions we face: Where is God in our suffering? How do we make sense of our grief?…
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How to Trust God in the Face of Relentless Struggles (Psalm 56)
This past few weeks have been tough. Between health concerns, family challenges, stretching my faith, and just the daily grind, it’s been hard to keep going. I’ve felt spiritually drained, emotionally overwhelmed, and physically tired. In those moments, the recurring thought God seems to place in my heart is, “Bless more people.” That’s not…
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Spiritual Warfare, Marriage, Pornography, and How to Get Motivated (Wednesday Check-In Topics)
This week’s Wednesday Check-In focused on powerful themes: spiritual warfare, marriage, pornography, and struggling with motivation. Below, I’ve summarized the highlights, retaining the pastoral insights and key moments of interaction that make digital ministry impactful. Spiritual Warfare: Recognizing the Battle We Face Understanding Spiritual WarfareSpiritual warfare is not merely an ancient idea but a…
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Lonely but Driven: Hunter Thornton’s Indie Game Development Journey to Build Community
Welcome to the Creator Profile Series, where we highlight incredible individuals who have answered God’s call to reach the world in unique ways. Traditional churches often struggle to connect with niche communities online, especially those who feel isolated or disconnected. God is raising up content creators from all over the world to fill that…
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The Wednesday Check-In: How TACO’s Discord Provides Digital Christian Community
Listen to “Stream Story” Podcast Episodes here: In today’s digital world, communities are finding new ways to gather, connect, and support each other, even when they’re separated by thousands of miles. The TACO Discord has grown into a vibrant online community, acting as a digital church providing pastoral care for the digital age. Recently,…
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The Wounds of the Faithful: Diana Winkler’s Mission to Heal (Creator Profile Series)
Welcome to the Creator Profile Series, where we highlight incredible individuals who have answered God’s call to reach the world in unique ways. Traditional churches often struggle to connect with niche communities online, especially those affected by ‘church hurt’—a phenomenon where individuals leave the church due to negative experiences, such as judgment, hypocrisy, or…
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It’s Support-A-Thon Sunday! (Come Join In!)
I’m excited to invite you to my Support-A-Thon happening this Sunday, September 29th, at 10 AM EST on my Twitch Channel! This event is not just about having fun—it’s a chance for our amazing community to come together and help support some really important future ministry goals. What’s the Goal?This Support-A-Thon will help raise…
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Alone, Vulnerable & Scammed: Escaping an Emotionally Manipulative Scam with the Help of Digital Community
Listen to “Stream Story” Podcast Episodes here: We were deep into Nier: Automata, fighting off enemies and discussing the game’s heavier themes when the chat took an unexpected turn. One of our regulars, Ferric, dropped in, and I greeted him with a hearty, “How are you doing, man?” His response: “Not good… not good…
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Crowdsourcing a Complicated Emotional Situation – Stream Stories
Listen to “Stream Story” Podcast Episodes here: It came out of nowhere, completely unplanned. We were in the middle of playing NieR:Automata—a game full of philosophical questions and complex moral choices—when a viewer named “Kit the Dragon” started pouring out a complicated and emotional situation: “My housemate admitted they have feelings for me, and…
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A First Responder’s Story of Tragedy and Trauma – Stream Stories
Listen to “Stream Story” Podcast Episodes here: As a digital pastor with a livestream, I often find myself suddenly hearing stories full of real, raw human emotion—that leave a deep impact on both me and my community. Recently, a police officer opened up during one of my streams, sharing the heart-wrenching account of a…
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Why ComicCon Made Me Cry: The Heartbreaking Reality For Some Who Attend (and What We Can Do)
I’ve always looked forward to ComicCon, but this year, it was more than just an event for me. It became a window into a deeper truth. In fact, telling this story has brought me to tears twice this week. Over the past couple of years, I’ve been able to bring some young people with…
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The Role of Prayer in Content Creation: Passion & Pivotal Moments (Series Introduction)
What Do You Do Before Creating Content? Imagine you’re getting ready to start a big creator project – new video, art portfolio, new podcast concept, stream-a-thon. You’ve got your equipment set up, software open, references lined up, and a carefully curated playlist in the background to keep your energy up. You even posted on…
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Can I Ask For a Small Favour That Could Make a Big Difference?
As many of you know, I’ve been dedicated to reaching the lost, lonely, and disconnected through my work as a digital pastor. Whether it’s gamers, remote workers, or those struggling with mental health challenges, my mission is to bring God’s love and connection to those who feel isolated in the online world. Over time,…
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10 Steps to Uncover God’s Purpose for Your Content
Are you feeling called to content creation but struggling to understand why? Do you wonder what purpose God has for you in the digital space? Here are ten practical steps to help you align your content with God’s calling. I’ve also included some example answers from my own exploration of this exercise. 1. Burdens…
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Serious Injury, Difficult Decisions, Predatory Loans: Moments from This Week’s Streams
I’m so blessed to be able to connect to people in this way. A special moment this week was when a viewer from New Zealand share that she was recently hit by a car and was in the hospital with serious injuries and expecting her leg to be amputated below the knee. It was…
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Uncovering the Purpose of Your Content as a Christian Creator
As Christian content creators, it’s easy to get lost in the pursuit of likes, shares, and followers. But our true calling goes beyond the metrics. We’re not just here to entertain; we’re here to serve a higher purpose. Our content is meant to reflect His priorities, showcase the unique gifts He’s given us, and…
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Discovering Your God-Given Mission in Content Creation
As Christian content creators, it’s easy to get swept up in the whirlwind of trends, algorithms, and audience expectations. But our calling goes beyond just chasing the latest fads. We’re more than just entertainers; we’re messengers with a unique mission. How can we tap into the deeper, God-given purpose that guides our work and…
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Discover Your God-Given Purpose: 8 Steps to Uncover What You’re Meant to Do
Are you struggling to find your purpose in life? You’re not alone. Many of us wonder how to align our talents, passions, and opportunities with what God has in store for us. In a recent discussion, I explored how to discover your God-given purpose and what steps you can take to uncover what you’re…
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XtianNinja’s Rogue Energy $10 Gift Cards Giveaway!
Hello friends, supporters, and fellow nerds! As a token of appreciation for your amazing support, I’m giving away three $10 Rogue Energy gift cards! Whether you’re a stream viewer, a loyal supporter, or a new newsletter subscriber, this giveaway is for you! Why Rogue? Here’s an article I wrote recently explaining why I partnered…
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Anxiety Meds, Intrusive Thoughts, Mental Health Compassion: Moments from This Week’s Streams
So many things happen during a week of livestreams that it would be impossible for me to make them into separate YouTube videos or articles – but are too exciting to keep to myself. My plan is to gather some of the best segments and provide links so you can come and watch the…
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Partnering to Help Pros, Students, Streamers & Gamers with a Healthier Energy Option
As you know, I’ve been seeking creative ways to fund the initiatives we are so passionate about at XtianNinja Online Missions and The Alliance for Creative Outreach (TACO). I’m excited to share a new partnership that aligns with our mission, can help a bunch of people, and that I think you’ll want to be…