Introduction
This week for the Wednesday Check-In, I want to focus on a deeply personal message that someone shared in our Discord’s prayer channel:
“I’m just not okay.”
Many of us have felt this way. Whether you’re a content creator struggling with burnout, a viewer battling anxiety, or someone feeling lost and disconnected—this message resonates deeply. Today, I want to explore three critical aspects:
- What to do when you’re not okay.
- How to respond when someone else shares they’re struggling.
- How the audience can support a content creator who is “not okay.”
During the stream, I shared how seeing this message on Discord brought to mind the many times I’ve encountered or sent a similar message myself. It’s simple but heavy. Sometimes, saying “I’m not okay” feels like an act of desperation—a plea for someone to notice, care, or just be there. Let’s start by addressing what to do when you’re the one struggling.
Here’s a link to the video: https://youtu.be/zS4A_LSzIWA
1. What to Do When You’re Not Okay
Feeling “not okay” looks different for everyone. Some might feel socially isolated, while others work full-time jobs and are surrounded by people but still feel lonely or overwhelmed. Here’s how we can address both groups:
For Those Struggling with Social Anxiety or Isolation
- Engage Digitally:
Watch Christian creators or join online communities like Discord servers where you can feel safe.
Sometimes, when you’re feeling disconnected, showing up in a digital space can make a difference. As I said during the stream, “Pick a Discord community—not 76 of them, but one where you’ll engage, not just scroll.” Even a small interaction, like posting a simple “Hey, I’m here, not doing great,” can spark connection. You don’t need to engage fully right away; even lurking in a positive environment helps create a sense of belonging.
- Send a Private DM to Someone You Trust:
This could be a digital way to take that first step.
I talked about how a private message can be a lifeline. “Sometimes, you just send a quick message: ‘I don’t want to explain, but I need someone to know.’” This small step doesn’t solve everything, but it breaks the isolation and opens the door for further support.
- Anonymous Support:
There are a lot of free resources available for help. Call your doctor and church office to see if there are groups or counselling options available. For example, with my denomination, I get 6 free sessions with a counsellor because I’m a pastor.
Reaching out anonymously can feel safer when vulnerability is difficult. I shared during the stream that I didn’t even know about the free counselling sessions available through my denomination until someone mentioned it offhand. These resources exist, but they take a bit of effort to find. It could be as simple as calling your church office or doctor to ask for referrals. If you’re not ready to do it today, make a note for when you’re feeling stronger.
- Build Slowly:
Take small steps to engage with people in low-pressure settings. Even posting in a shared channel or group can help break the cycle of isolation.
Breaking the cycle of isolation starts with small, manageable actions. I mentioned in the stream how the enemy thrives on keeping us alone, feeding us lies like “Nobody wants to hear from you” or “You’ll just be a burden.” Pushing back against these thoughts with even the smallest acts of connection—like joining a Minecraft server, posting a meme, or saying hi in chat—can help you regain a sense of community.
For Those Who Work or Have Friends
Even those with regular jobs and social circles can feel “not okay.” Sometimes, external busyness masks internal struggles:
- Be Honest with Someone You Trust:
If you feel you’re wearing a mask, take a step of vulnerability with a close friend, family member, or mentor.
During the stream, I shared how hard it can be to admit that you’re struggling, especially when you’ve been hurt before. I talked about how sometimes when you share your struggles, it doesn’t go well—they might gossip, use it against you, or treat you differently. It makes it harder to trust anyone. But despite that, finding someone trustworthy and being honest with them is essential. It doesn’t need to be a deep conversation; even saying ‘I’m not okay’ can be a big step toward healing.
- Schedule Rest:
Burnout often happens when we don’t intentionally set aside time to recharge physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
Rest is non-negotiable, but many of us neglect it. I talked during the stream about how some people work all week and then serve all Sunday, with rest being a foreign concept to them. I mentioned how they end up running on the ragged edge of burnout because they never give themselves permission to just stop, recharge, connect with God, and let others serve them. Scheduling intentional downtime—whether it’s a quiet day at home or letting others serve you for once—is critical to avoiding burnout
- Connect with Purpose:
Don’t just “hang out” to distract yourself—seek conversations or activities that feed your soul.
During the stream, I highlighted how meaningful connections require vulnerability. Casual distractions are fine, but conversations that go deeper help nurture your spirit. As I said, ‘If everything is a mile wide and an inch deep, you’ll never feel like you really have good friends, or that your burdens are being shared by others.’ True purposeful connection comes from being in places where you can be vulnerable, surrounded by people you trust and who allow you to let your guard down
For Very Bad Days (When Motivation Feels Impossible)
When you feel like you can’t do anything, these steps may help:
- Focus on Tiny Wins:
Break your day into the smallest steps—get out of bed, drink water, or sit near a window. Achieving one tiny goal can help you move forward.
As I shared in the stream, “Sometimes, even getting out of bed feels impossible. But if you can focus on just one small thing—like taking a shower, brushing your teeth, or having a glass of water—it starts to shift your mindset.” Tiny wins build momentum, and that first small act can often lead to the next.
- Forgive Yourself:
Tell yourself it’s okay to have a bad day and that you’ve had them in the past and you’re still here.
Bad days happen, and they don’t define you. “You’ve been through bad days before,” I said during the stream, “and you’re still here. Give yourself grace. Not every day has to be productive or perfect.”
- Look at the Bigger Picture:
Zoom out and look at your life from a larger perspective. Are you doing better this week than last? Better this month than last? Better this year than last? Then today is just a bump—it’s a thing that happens on the road of life.
I shared how important it is to shift your perspective: “Sometimes, a bad day feels like the end of the world. But if you step back, you might see that overall, you’re making progress. One bad day doesn’t erase how far you’ve come.”
- Avoid Comparison:
Don’t compare yourself to others; everyone goes through different things and handles them differently. You handle things your way. Just because it’s different doesn’t mean it’s wrong.
Social media can make it easy to fall into the comparison trap. “You see someone’s highlight reel, and it makes you feel worse,” I explained. “But their journey isn’t yours. Focus on your own path and what works for you.”
- Short Prayers:
If you can’t muster a long prayer, say, “Lord, help me.” Remember, Romans 8:26 says the Spirit intercedes when we don’t have words.
During the stream, I reminded everyone, “Even a simple ‘flare prayer’—‘Lord, help me’—is enough. The Spirit intercedes when words fail. You don’t need a polished prayer for God to hear you.”
- Engage Passively:
Listen to Christian music, watch an uplifting video, or read a short devotional. Even passive engagement can redirect your focus.
On the stream, I suggested, “Sometimes, all you can do is sit and listen—whether it’s a worship playlist or an encouraging sermon. Even that small input can help shift your mindset.”
- Create a “Bad Day Kit”:
Prepare a box or folder filled with Scripture cards, a playlist of encouraging music, or a journal for moments like this.
I shared how having a “bad day kit” can be a game-changer: “When you’re at your lowest, having something ready—a playlist, a journal, Scripture cards, or even a favorite book—can remind you of truth and bring some comfort. I also mentioned adding things like photos that bring back happy memories or a comforting scent like lavender, anything that helps ground you and remind you of better times.”
2. How to Respond When Someone Shares They’re Struggling
Encouraging someone in a digital space:
- Show You’re Present:
Send short, simple messages like, “Thinking about you,” or share an encouraging verse. A GIF, meme, or short prayer can go a long way.
During the stream, I mentioned how even the smallest acknowledgment can mean the world to someone who’s struggling. “In our prayer channel, we have a rule: we don’t try to fix things. Sometimes, all someone needs is to know they’re seen and cared for.”
- Check In Without Pressure:
Let them know you’re available whenever they’re ready to talk.
I explained, “It’s okay to send a quick message like, ‘I’m here when you’re ready.’ That simple act of patience can help them feel less alone.”
- Send Encouraging Content:
Share a video, sermon, or resource you’ve found helpful during hard times. Always include an explanation as to why you’re sending it and what it meant to you.
“Don’t just drop a link and walk away,” I said. “If you’re sharing something, explain why it mattered to you. It makes it feel more personal and intentional.”
- Remain Available:
Keep reaching out occasionally to remind them you care, but don’t overwhelm them. - Ask Mutual Friends or Mods:
If you’re part of the same community, discreetly ask others if they’ve heard from them. - Pray for Them Specifically:
Trust God’s care for them when you can’t reach them.
If They Completely Disappear:
- Respect Their Boundaries:
Sometimes people need space, but keep them in your prayers. - Contact Community Leaders:
If you’re concerned for their safety, reach out to someone who might know how to support them.
I shared how this approach respects both their need for space and your concern for their well-being. During the stream, I emphasized, “Sometimes people need space, but it’s important to let them know you’re still there for them.” It’s about striking a balance—showing care without being overbearing, like when I said, “You can reach out every so often, let them know you’re thinking about them without pressure, and give them time to respond when they’re ready.”
3. How the Audience Can Support a Content Creator Who Is “Not Okay”
Content creators often face unique pressures that can significantly impact their mental health. The constant demand for fresh content, managing public personas, and navigating online criticism contribute to stress, anxiety, and burnout. A study by Healthy Gamer and Stream Hatchet revealed that 67% of content creators experience mental health challenges, surpassing rates found in the general workforce.
Small content creators often experience even more fear and pressure than their larger counterparts. Unlike big creators who may have a supportive team or enough financial security to take a break, smaller creators usually manage everything themselves—from planning and producing content to editing, promoting, and engaging with their community. This all-encompassing workload leaves little room for rest and adds immense pressure to keep producing without a break. They fear that any hiatus, even a short one, could lead to a loss of the small audience they’ve worked so hard to build. Because they lack the safety net that bigger creators may have, every dip in engagement or every day away from creating content feels like a threat to their progress and stability. This constant cycle of output, fear, and self-doubt can easily lead to burnout, making community support and understanding all the more essential for their mental well-being.
Here’s how you, as a viewer, can help:
Encourage Rest
Let them know it’s okay to take breaks
Tell them their well-being matters more than the content they produce.
During the stream, I said, “Sometimes creators need to hear, ‘It’s okay to rest.’ Your encouragement can make them feel less guilty about taking time off.” The truth is, as content creators, we often feel like if we take a break, we’re letting people down or risking losing our audience. When a viewer tells us, “We’ll still be here when you get back,” it has a profound effect. It helps creators reframe their mindset and genuinely feel less pressure to keep pushing through burnout. Encouraging messages like, “Take your time; I look forward to your next stream,” can help break the cycle of guilt and anxiety and speaks directly to a core fear many creators have—that if they stop, the audience will move on. Your reassurance can be powerful in dispelling these fears.
Be Patient and Kind
If they miss an upload or seem off during a stream, show grace and understanding. Even casual teasing can sometimes add stress, especially if the creator is struggling. Instead of asking, “When’s the next video coming out?” consider saying something like, “I loved your last stream and am looking forward to the next one.” This way, your message is both supportive and without pressure.
During the stream, I shared how being patient and supportive can go a long way, especially when a creator is going through a tough time. As a viewer, offering an encouraging comment with no strings attached can make all the difference. For instance, simply saying, “I really enjoyed the last thing you made, and I’m excited for whenever you’re ready to post more,” keeps the positivity without adding stress.
Lighten Their Load
Small acts like offering to moderate chat, clipping highlights, or helping with thumbnails can significantly lighten a small creator’s workload. I shared how helpful it is when viewers offer to do small tasks: “Do you need me to go through and highlight some videos? Do you need me to help with some thumbnails?” These gestures can be a huge relief for a creator feeling overwhelmed.
And to the creators out there: accept the help! Even if the result isn’t exactly what you envisioned, it’s still saving you time and reducing your workload. During the stream, I said, “Accept the help—even if it’s not the clip you would have picked, post it anyway. Even if it’s not the exact thumbnail you wanted, it’s okay. It saved you some time.”
Publicly Praise Them
Post positive reviews or kind comments about their work on social media. A little recognition can mean the world to a small creator. During the stream, I emphasized that public praise can be incredibly encouraging, especially when it feels like nobody is paying attention. “If you tag me in a post or comment about something I did, it really means everything. It doesn’t need to be much—a simple shoutout can make a big difference.”
As small creators, we often put out content and feel like no one is listening or watching. Just knowing that someone took the time to leave a kind comment or share something can be incredibly motivating. So, don’t underestimate the power of a small gesture like posting, “I appreciate what this creator does; go check them out.”
Support Their Passion
If you’re able, consider subscribing, buying merch, or sharing their content to help their community grow. It might seem trivial, but when a creator sees their merch being worn or gets an unexpected subscription, it makes a big difference. I shared how even something small, like a $1 donation for a coffee, can lift our spirits. It’s not about the money—it’s the recognition that people care and are invested in our work.
“It feels really good when someone invests in you, especially when you’re feeling down,” I said during the stream. Whether it’s a follow, a sub, or buying some merch, these small acts help creators feel valued and remind us why we do what we do.
Conclusion
It’s okay to not be okay. Whether you’re the one struggling, witnessing someone else’s pain, or supporting a content creator, remember that God sees you and loves you. Communities like TACO and others exist to provide connection and care. Lean into these spaces, take small steps toward vulnerability, and trust that healing is a journey worth taking.
